Staying motivated while living with narcolepsy is one of the most difficult challenges I experience. There is so much that I want and need to accomplish in my everyday life, but more times than I like to admit, I find myself overwhelmed and unmotivated to do anything.
It is a downhill slide from there. The motivation to complete the days tasks disappears. The motivation I may have started the day with is taken over by an avalanche of overwhelming feelings that drain me of any energy I may have had before facing the day.
I am then so tired that the day passes without much accomplished or at least the bare minimum and I fall into bed at night feeling as if another day has gotten away from me. Narcolepsy has stolen another day and it isn’t fair – to me or my family. I need motivation to fight the tiredness of Narcolepsy.
Although I have days where the battle is difficult, I still push myself to keep trying. It’s really all any of us, with or without narcolepsy can do, keep trying to do the best that we can. Some nights I fall into bed feeling completed defeated and other nights feeling as if I moved mountains that day which leave me feeling accomplished and satisfied with myself. I won – Narcolepsy didn’t steal the day.
I awoke with the energy and motivation! I have learned that I can’t expect those around me to motivate me, it has to come from myself. How much am I willing to fight? I will not say I don’t have days that are completely void of any motivation or energy, I do.
In fact, I went to bed last night determined and fully motivated to awaken today and accomplish posting a blog and taking care of tasks around the house.
It is 6:50 p.m. and I am just now posting my blog and task around the house have not been completed. I have dropped a light bulb that slipped right through my hands, cataplexy of course, dropped a shelf I was hanging, and forgot how to log into my blog. I’m feeling drained, tired and have wanted to stomp my feet and cry. It’s been one of those days.
My body and mind have not wanted to push like my heart wanted it to push.
I didn’t give up though. I shed a few tears and I did stomp my foot (don’t tell anyone though) but I told myself not to give up, you can get this post done.
I motivated myself and through this self motivation I am accomplishing, at least, one major task I had set out to accomplish today. To some it may not seem like such a big deal or even appear that I had a “lazy day”. Oh well, I have to look within myself and find the joy in motivating myself to accomplish something I felt was important.
Although, this may not be my best article, it is most definitely heartfelt and true. I will be able to lie down tonight and take a deep breathe knowing I did my best.
My prayer for each and every one of you out there is to not give up, tell yourself you can do whatever it is you want to do and if it isn’t accomplished today, there is always tomorrow. Just don’t lose sight of the importance of motivating yourself to find the joy in each and every day.